Let’s talk to people!
Good morning, folks! I am Jin with Morning Mindfulness Podcast. Hope you are having a Fabulous today. Let’s breathe and smile.

Talk to People, not About People!

Let’s imagine the scenario: somebody does something that the other person does not like. What happens? The person who does not like what was done goes to his or her friends, points at the person who did it and says something like, “Look at what XYZ did. That’s not right!” That creates a gossip. As a result this gossip will go around and come to the person who’s the object of the discussion. This definitely does not improve friendship.

I understand that a lot of gossiping comes as a result of low self esteem of the person creating the gossip. These people are looking for the approval from their friend, like, look at him, he’s bad and I am good. And when friends agree with the statement, that creates a really positive emotion to feed the ego.

However, there’s a flip side to that. The person talking bad about somebody cannot be trusted, because today he’s talking bad about somebody, and tomorrow he’s talking bad to somebody about you. The hungry ego has to be fed daily.

The best solution – never talk bad about somebody and don’t support those who do. First of all, in order for me to say that he’s wrong, I have to be sure I am right. As I discussed last time, there’s no way I can know the whole story behind somebody’s actions.

Second, if I don’t like what somebody did, why not go and ask in person? I don’t have to say, “You’re fool! Why did you do that?” But I can go and ask, “Why did you do that?” Maybe there was a valid reason behind actions I did not know about. And potential conflict would be eliminated. Think about that.

Now let’s breathe and smile. Thanks for stopping by. I will talk to you next time.

PEACE!
Jin

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